Inspiration Strikes

Helena using her power to save a roly poly bug

I could blame my inability to stay on top of most revolving tasks on lack of time, motivation, or energy – it certainly wouldn't be for lack of material. Though I manage to update my notebook with various Helena-isms or events in her life practically daily, transcribing those scribbled notes into a worthy arrangement of paragraphs can prove all too cumbersome a feat. Especially once those quotes and updates begin to pile up onto each other. Then, where there was once a single milestone to document, there are now five, then ten... and before you know it, four months have passed.

In addition to today's post, I'll catch you up with a synopsis and some photos of the past few months, which you have missed during my absentia. The reason I found the inspiration to write today is that I saw something that I didn't want to dismiss from my memory and be scrambling to remember tomorrow. Not that I think I could forget an image so profound that introduced me to a side of Helena's personality that I hadn't witnessed before.

This morning, as I dropped her off at school, I stood on the sidelines as I watched her run excitedly toward the playground packed with as many children as it could possibly accommodate. But something different happened when Helena ran up, compared to when any other child wandered into the playground. As Helena approached, a little girl greeted her with a huge smile and a "HELENAAAAAAAA!!!!" She hugged the girl, who in turn hugged her back and then took her hand. Out of earshot, I couldn't hear how their conversation progressed, but I could see Helena pointing and directing the girl around the area. After only a few moments, this exact greeting and action occurred again. This time with a not-so-little girl. Yet she hugged Helena, took her hand, and allowed herself to be led around.

This happened not only twice, but three – THREE – more times after that. Not once did I see this kind of behavior spark around any of the other kids. Just random running and screaming and playing. And here was Helena with her little cult of children – most of them much bigger than her – and she was the ruler of all of them. When Helena pointed, the other kids looked; when she ran, the others followed quickly behind her. As she set her sights on one of the little boys from her class, she chased him up and down and around the playground... with a string of five other girls bringing up the rear. None of them were as quick as her, and a couple of the heavier girls gave up their pursuit as fast as they had begun. When Helena finally caught up with the boy, she grabbed his arm and attempted to pull him to the area in which her followers had congregated. The boy resisted, freed himself from her grasp, and ran away.

Helena then made her way over to me, and I asked her why she had chased Gavin that way. She simply said, "Because he is fun to chase." At this point, the collection of Helenaholics had also made their way toward us. One of the girls replied, "You can chase me, Helena. I don't mind." To which Helena retorted, "But you're not Gavin." And I commented on how she was only willing to chase the one boy who didn't want to be around her. And I couldn't help thinking.... Like mother, like daughter.

It was interesting to see the obvious influence and admiration Helena had garnered over a good portion of the kids she interacted with in only a 10-minute period of time. The attention and affection she commanded without an ounce of effort. It impressed me, to be honest. I am so intrigued to see how she will use this power as she grows.

My Kid is Cooler Than Your Kid...

... because my kid gets ready for school and remembers to grab her stuffed animal, but forgets her bookbag.

Helena-ism 346

While recording messages through an app on my phone:

Me: "Give Charlie a chance to say something."

Helena: "Not in that language."

(Referring to Charlie's super cute jibberish babbling.)

Helena-ism 345

"Out here it smells like sweet candy. In there, it smells like a dead animal."

(Referencing the bathroom stall she just came out of.)

Helena-ism 344

While running Helena into class before the tardy bell:

Me: "Phew! I'm outta shape!"

Helena: "What?! You lost your shapes?? Don't worry I'll help you find them when we get home."

Helena-ism 343

Jordon: "Sheesh, she's just a plethora of questions today."

Helena: "Nooooo... you're a question cafeteria!"

Playing Catch-Up

Well, I have just been horrible about staying on top of this blog. I have it on my to-do list pretty much every day, but it finds its way further and further down my ever-expanding queue. Ironically, most of those things have to do with Helena. But without further ado, I will get to all the hellcat news you have been waiting so patiently for.

Last month (it already feels like so long ago), my little sister, Lauren, and her baby girl, Charlie, came out to Arizona for a visit. It was some of my favorite days since I've moved here nine years ago. Wait... did I just say NINE years?! Wow, that is crazy. I honestly hadn't realized it until I just now counted the years – on my fingers, of course. During their time out here, Helena and Charlie were inseparable. They had slumber parties every night, wore matching outfits, made a stuffed animal pet store (I'll never forget when Charlie pointed out a horse and said it had a "heart on", but it sounded like "hard on"), they watched a documentary on turtles (and both started crying when they realized that most baby turtles die by predators on their journey from the sand to the ocean), they even got in the freezing cold pool. It's true, Charlie got a little too ballsy and nearly sunk to the bottom twice. Luckily, Lauren was waiting to save her, and shortly thereafter we picked up some water wings for her. We got to celebrate Charlie's 3rd birthday while they were here and we had a belated family birthday dinner at one of my favorite restaurants downtown, The Parlor. To draw the trip to an end, we had a final bash in their honor and screened the movie "Heathers" on the projector outside by the pool. We customized the food to suit the references in the movie, and took a crack at potato croquettes which came out AMAZING!

Birthday Pancakes for Baby Charlie



I should mention they were actually drinking grape juice


Apprentice snake handlers


Two kids in a candy store


Looking through the hole in the rock

Charlie, ya got a little something on your face...

Our Going Away / Heathers Party

Family Dinner at The Parlor


As they left, and Spring Break was over, reality ensued and Helena, Jordon, and I were alone again and back to our normal routine. While having one of our regular dinners, Helena would share with us the usual type of conversation that she generally does.

"Gavin and Ryder were saying mean things about girls."

"What were they saying?"

"That girls have cooties. (I'm going to interject to say that I didn't realize that this was a thing kids actually said) And Gloria and I were running after them and trying to catch them, but they kept running away. And we kept chasing them and even grabbed their shirts to make them stop running, but they kept running. We tried to tell them to stop so we could talk to them, but they WOULDN'T STOP!"

"Well, what was so important that you were trying to tell them?"

"We were trying to tell them that it isn't nice to run away from people when they want to tell you something."

Yep, wrap your heads around that one, folks. That's all she had to say. Stop! I'm trying to tell you that it's not nice to not stop when someone has something to tell you, but I don't have anything to tell you besides just that, so now you may continue running. So priceless.

Our routine isn't all the same though. Hellcat and I have started waking up a bit earlier than usual, so we can sneak in some time to swing by Jamba Juice before heading to school. This has made her excited beyond belief. After the first day we did it successfully and I agreed to do it the next day, I woke up at 6:00AM – when my alarm doesn't go off until 6:45 – to a fully dressed and alert Helena asking me for her smoothie. It was the most seamless morning of getting ready and getting her out the door that we have ever had. I only wish every morning could be like that. But, I suppose, breaking routines is part of the excitement of our days. Who knows what tomorrow will be like? I don't, but I can't wait to find out. You probably won't because I stink at updating this blog. ;)

Helena-ism 342

Me: "Are you going to take all of Jordon's money?"

Helena: "Psh, Jordon doesn't even have any money."

Helena-ism 341

Helena: "Mom, I ate my dinner. Can I have a cookie?"

Me: "Or would you rather have these?"

(As I pull Cinnamon Twists out of the bag that I had been hiding. Keep in mind, "dinner" was Taco Bell.)

Helena: "Oh, you know me."

Helena-ism 340

Me: "Time to wake up."

Helena: "Come back in October."

Helena-ism 339

"It's windy this morning. You should have checked the Weather Channel."

My Kid is Cooler Than Your Kid...

... because she understands winning isn't everything.

Helena: "Chess club is great! Even if I don't win!"

Helena-ism 338

"Mom... I love you."

"Jordon... You stink."

Check PlayMate

I have officially signed Helena up for her first extracurricular activity and I'm proud to say it's just about the nerdiest thing a kid can do – Chess Club. I'm even prouder to say that she absolutely loves it, and I'd much rather have her doing something that encourages her to use her mind than most of the other after-school activities for kids. Hopefully, this is a step in the right direction of ensuring she doesn't grow up to be a superficial airhead.

Her first match was against a girl about a year older than her. This was her recap of their trash talk to each other:

Girl: "Okay, little girl... you might be cute and you might be sweet, but tonight... you're gonna be my chicken!"

Helena: "And you're gonna be my drink! And that drink is WINE!!"

Turns out, during that match Helena snagged the little girl's queen. During her next match, she played a boy who was in 4th grade and took him to the cleaners. Could my little girl potentially be the next Bobby Fisher? Eh, I'd say given the events she's already experienced during her short life, she's definitely due for a biopic made in her honor.

I look forward to keeping everyone informed of her progress as the rest of the matches unfold.

Helena-ism 337

"Mom, can you ask Ameya's mommy if she can come over for a sleepover? Write her a note that says 'Check Yes or Yes'."

Helena-ism 336

"Ooh! A gamegirl!!"

My Kid is Cooler Than Your Kid...

... because she is the VIP of her class!

The Listening Game

One of the things I love about being a parent, is getting to see the development happen within your child. When they're born, they look to you for everything that they need to learn to become functional human beings, capable of speech, thought, and opinions. What nobody tells you though, is that eventually those cute little drool-ridden babies will one day use that speech to lie to your face, ignore your requests and make their own decisions (regardless of how poor a decision it is), and form opinions so strong to the point of sheer absurdity. What's that? You'd like me to elaborate? Well, alrighty then...

I give you Exhibit A: Kids (no matter how great of a kid you have) will lie to you.

Recently, one night while Helena was brushing her teeth, she asked me to get her mouthwash out for her. Well "mousewash" as we so affectionately dubbed it one silly night. The "mousewash" comes after the "moosepaste", in case you were wondering. This bubble gum mouthwash is electric blue and drops of it get all over the place when she uses it. That's the last time I try to save a couple dollars and don't get the pretty pink, non-staining mouthwash. As this night will teach me, there's another good reason to splurge on that $4.99 price tag for the pink variety. The pink mouthwash offers a top that doesn't pour, but you squeeze to fill the top part of the bottle and then pour that small amount into the cap to use. It's to prevent kids from spilling the open bottle of mouthwash all over the bathroom counter. Um, can you guess where I'm going with this?

Little did I know when I tucked my cute, adorable, innocent Helena into bed that night that she was hiding a terrible secret. And I didn't discover that secret until I opened the shower curtain and saw one of my good washcloths covered in bright blue stains. Upon further inspection of the bathroom, I saw remnants of blue splotches all along the sink, the white countertops, and it had even managed its way into some of the drawers. When I woke Helena up in the morning and showed her the washcloth, after first trying to avoid it, she inevitably confessed to spilling the mouthwash all over and attempting to clean it up without telling me so I wouldn't be upset. Her words: "Well, um... I was thinking... that you have so much other stuff to do... liiiiiike, um... cleaning up the house and going to work, and so I was thinking.... that you wouldn't want to clean up my mess. And I made it, so I thought I should clean it... but I didn't want to frustrate you... soooooooo......"

How can you argue with that?

Exhibit B: After long enough of thinking for themselves, kids will eventually not care about anything you have to say.

While riding on her bike with Jordon the other day – I, lonely and bikeless, watched from the yard – I saw them circle back and forth. And I very clearly heard Jordon say multiple times as he looped the street and turned around, "Don't go in the street. Don't go in the street. Don't go in the street!!"

And as I anticipate her next move, I start to yell, "Helena, DON'T GO IN THE ST-----". Did she listen, you may be wondering. Well, if she had, there would really be no story, would there? As she took the ramp down a driveway into the street, she nearly clipped an SUV coming from the direction which she didn't bother to look in. (By the way, I'm pretty sure I taught her to look both ways too.) Luckily, the driver was paying more attention than she was and had already come to a complete stop preventing any potential injury. Still, my heart jumped in my throat and she was forbade from going out on her bike again the rest of the day.


Finally, Exhibit C: Kids are very steadfast in their opinions.

What this means, is that you could set up a play date with your daughter's newest friend, let them play and run around, take them to get ice cream and let them pick whatever they want – but if you decide to put M&M's on top of that Coconut ice cream she chose, you better be ready to incur the wrath. Is Helena the only child on the planet that could be promised a day of fun and ice cream and then still be brought to tears over M&M's on her ice cream, which she didn't ask for? Possibly. But I can approach this situation from one of two avenues. Either tell her to be appreciative and take what she gets and don't complain (which I did). Or I can be proud that she knows what she wants and is willing to speak up when things don't go her way. Maybe an incident as small as crying over M&M's proves to me that my little girl isn't going to be the type to be kicked around. She's not ever going to be happy with just anything that anyone gives her. She is a child of conviction, who won't settle for less than what she wants and won't stop until she gets it. Of course, the more probable scenario is that she is an only child and growing more entitled with every passing day... but we'll work on that.

Helena-ism 335

Helena: "Riley moved to Kansas and I'm worried about her."

Me: "Why?"

Helena: "Because! TORNADOES!!!"

Helena-ism 334

"I had to go to the bathroom. That's what took me slow long."

(then laughing at herself)

"Slow long?! That doesn't even make sense!"

Helena-ism 333

When I turned a song up on the radio, it was met with:

Helena: "Boo, boo, boooooo, boooooooooooooo, booooooooooooooooo"

Me: "Helena, I like this song. I listen to songs you like all the time. Don't complain."

Helena: "I wasn't complaining... I was just trying to scare you."

iHuh?

Helena's listening to an episode of iCarly where she keeps shouting "Mitch", but it sounds like "Bitch".

Helena-ism 332

"I had the greatest poop ever because I wiped and nothing was there on the toilet paper. It was soooooooo greeeeeeeaaaaaaatttttttttt."

Helena-ism 331

When tucking her in at night:

"Bundle me, Mom... like Progressive."

Sorry Charlie

Had another video I had to post of Helena and her little cousin, Charlie. What's hilarious about it is that Charlie thought I was taking a picture, so she kept yelling "Cheese!" Aw, I miss that little Charlie Dickens.

My Kid is Cooler Than Your Kid...

... because she's a natural on the ice!

Happy Nanu Year

So, here we are in 2012. Well, we've actually been here for a while already considering it's almost February. It's taken me some time to get back in the swing of things since we've gotten back to Arizona. I almost can't believe that I was in Ohio earlier this very month. It already feels like a year.

We spent a spectacular nine days with my family in Ohio, and everyone finally got to meet Jordon. As much as I had been anticipating it, each introduction went so smoothly, it was almost as if he had been visiting with me every time. He fit in like Tetris.

Only a few minor hiccups were experienced, like Helena barfing on the flight out, my sister's adverse reaction to her surgery, randomly throwing up repeatedly the day of our return flight, and nearly dying attempting to drive in a blizzard. I felt as though it was one of my best trips thus far, though, what with all the activities we managed to engage in and yet still found time to relax. It was a welcomed change to take a day trip over to Pittsburgh to see my oldest sister, which is something I generally don't get to do. "The cityyyyyyyyy" is phenomenal and sure to top mine and Jordon's "Places We'll Move To If Phoenix Blows Up" list. Some other top moments were ice skating in the park, playing Monopoly until 1:30AM at my mom's, celebrating some belated Christmases, and getting to visit with my grandma.

We closed the trip with the only night that wasn't spent with Helena (Grandma came over and babysat the girls), so we could go out for hibachi and some drinks and dancing. It was a much-needed night of fun since the next day involved a lot of vomit, nearly missing our plane, and being delayed over an hour. None of us had eaten all day and by the time we landed in Phoenix, Whataburger was the only place nearby that was open. Remind me to never go there again... for any reason. I'd rather starve.
 
The sadness of being far from family again was clinched when Helena realized that she lost her toy dolphin that she's had since she was two. She woke with tears and extreme concern that it was still nowhere to be found upon unpacking. So, if anyone happens to come across a small stuffed dolphin with a lei around her neck, her name is Nanu and there's a little girl that misses her very much. :(

Helena-ism 330

"Mom, my lips are chapped. Can you put some Vicksaline on em?"

Helena-ism 329

Helena: "Mooooommmmm... Jordon won't stop saying 'hilarious'."

Jordon: "Hilarious."

Me: "Or Helen-ious."

Helena: "Stop giving him ideas!!"

After a few more 'hilarious' remarks, she came back and showed us this:

Helena-ism 328

"I wanna know what data is... and day-ta. What are they?"

Helena-ism 327

Helena on Math (again):

Me: "All you have to do is count to twelve."

Helena: "But I don't have 12 fingers!!"

Helena-ism 326

Helena on Math:

"My brain is dissolving! My head is sucking out blood!"

My Kid is Cooler Than Your Kid...

... because she puts me in check.

Me: "We're poor."

Helena: "No, we're not. We get something every Christmas."